Well, it is the afternoon now that I'm getting around to making this entry, but so what? I did have a decent morning. As decent a morning as a single middle-class, full-bodied caucasian male of their low 20s can muster alone. Heh, just thought of calling myself full bodied because I am overweight but not in a shameful manner. Why should I feel less about myself just because I have a bloated stomach and full thighs and some underarm fat on my upper arms? It's not oh, super appealing but its not really anything repulsive either, just kinda funny if you ask me. And sometimes if you look at really muscular people, they look funny too. Especially those who are so thick their veins pop out in places... but personally that grosses me out a bit. So, in some ways I'm glad I'm not ripped. Plus, I have no major health concerns barring my abnormally low good cholesterol (i.e. the kind of cholesterol that helps prevent heart diseases). I could stand to exercise more but it really isn't fun nor motivating enough to do it on my own, so I don't get much activity in : /. Yes, I would be at least 3 times more likely to go out/work out if someone close to me asked to. No one's around so... yeah. Am I okay with this? Not really, but it's not like I can do anything to change it. Just something I'm not willing to do alone. And, wouldn't you feel better if your significant other was there by your side while you're running up a mountain? Well, I would. People don't get their good looks by doing nothing. So the looks I manage to have, I will accept because I think I look okay. Not great, not all around terrible, but okay. C+.
This morning I treated myself to my usual sitcoms and some Looney Toons that were on here and there. Family Matters, Boy Meets World, What I Like About You and Will & Grace were the various programs that made my morning. Some of my lusts were appealed to by the first two titles in particular. So on Family Matters, there was this one scene wherein Steve was laying on his stomach briefly, so his backside was up right? Okay, so I was checking out his ass... Jaleel White does have a pretty fine derriere. Given that he was probably nearing 20 in this episode (the actor), I don't consider my opinion inappropriate. And I do really have a weakness for dark-skinned persons... ch'yeah. It was a nicely shaped ass of an all around awesome black actor... nah, he was clothed in the scene asides. The show was never too risque, being geared towards families. And I like it that way. The Boy Meets World episode consisted of some cross dressing for Cory and Shawn. Personally, I really liked the first girl outfit that Cory(Ben Savage) donned, meaning, the way he looked in it appealed to me. Simple and clean, just a nice evening dress, heels (unnecessary) and a simple shoulder-bob wig. I like that (oh yeah, pantyhose too but details = blah). He kinda looked like my one neighbor up the street that was in my graduating class, the way he was made up to look there. I do mean this as a compliment. Besides, I do like chicks with dicks... bwahaha. P:
So this one guy I do like a fair deal, yes? I try talking to him, and try once again, all even though part of his nature does not agree well with me. The guy admits he finds people "ugly" but yet won't honor those people by telling them so openly. Yeah, I get the inkling he isn't too fond of my face with its fullness. I just wish he would at least honor me with honesty and say, "well, you're not much of a looker," and maybe even follow it with, "but thanks for your nice words," or something like that. I'm willing to give people chances. He may be kinda shallow but I don't like him any less because of that fact. I'm hoping he will give me other chances to prove I'm worth at least talking to. I'd be happy if we could at least be friends because well... most of my gay friends hardly talk to me and I have more friends who are bi or straight than I do as gay as me (90%). Hell, my most honorable friend (i.e. the one that puts the most effort, and this says a lot because they are not a very social individual) is pretty darn straight (good for him, vag repulses me, lolol). I don't demand someone talk to me all the time but it ticks me off, I try to get one of my friends' attention (one such being a guy I do find rather attractive asides him being rather gay, a plus) and he does not respond much of the time. I dunno if it's just all bad timing on my end but c'mon Wen... you're so cute and nice and... god can't I just say I enjoyed looking at some dude's ass today? Why do I have to keep all the meager happy parts of my life to myself? (Oh, I didn't mean to truly call you out when I wrote this, my friend, I just miss talking to you on a more active basis. <3) May seem odd to some people, but me, I feel this need to share things with other people, especially if its things I like and feel they can, too. Then maybe hit on them, not because I'm lonely (but yeah, I am) but because sh*t, most of my friends are hot xP.
Not sure what else to say right this moment. Some other stuff in my head but I'm trying not to be quite as rambling of late. Later to ya'll special people that read this~.
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